12 Ways Nurses can Make a Difference for a Patient with a Chronic Illness

Posted by Lisa Copen

September 3, 2009

The medical world could not function without nurses. It’s no secret to any of us who has had a doctor’s appointment or been in the hospital that a nurse can make all of the difference in our total experience and recovery process. Whether undergoing a routine procedure, scheduling a simple appointment, or being there beside us while the doctor has a serious conversation, a nurse’s presence can determine how well we as the patient copes with the situation and emotionally processes the outcome.

For most of us with a chronic illness, it is not a challenge to remember a nurse who hardly acknowledged our presence, one who kept forgetting to bring our medication when we were in the hospital, or just the nurse who overly enjoys her role as the gatekeeper to the doctor.

That said, chronically ill patients have a long list of encounters with nursing staff over the years, so we also have the advantage of being able to warm-heartedly recollect the nurses who made undeniable improvements in our healthcare. Perhaps she was an advocate on our behalf when no one else would listen. She may have looked the other way when visiting hours at the hospital were over. Or maybe she just held your hand while you had a painful (and lonely) medical procedure.

When I was recently checked into the hospital, the nurse had to push me outside from the wound care center around the hospital’s construction zone walkway. Ironically, we both had rheumatoid arthritis and I made a new friend by our simple ten-minute conversation. Despite my infection, I felt much more comfortable by the time I got to the hospital.

For years I’ve attempted to get a nurse to write an article about her typical day for HopeKeepers Magazine. I’d like patients to know how the nurse’s day is filled with scheduling issues, checking patients in and the constant lack of time to accomplish all that is expected.

I have not yet found a nurse who was willing to even be interviewed for such an article; more than a few have even exclaimed, “If anyone found out, I would lose my job!”

The better chronically ill patients and nurses keep trying to improve communication and increasingly understand one anothers needs however, there is only room for trusting relationships. It’s a relationship that (sadly) can last longer than a marriage.

Here are 12 tips chronically ill patients would like to give to nurses:

[1] When you ask “Are you taking any medications?” and I hand you two pages with them listed, please don’t look shocked or as if I am an addict.

[2] I grew weary of always been patient and only having everyone interested in what my body is doing. When you ask me how I am doing emotionally or coping with my illness, I feel like you really do care and I will naturally be more forthcoming about my physical symptoms that may be beneficial for the doctor to know.

[3] Thanks for celebrating little things with me, such as reaching a goal weight or decreasing a medication. I know you see these things every day, but to me they are a big deal. You are one of the few people who understand how hard it is for a chronically ill patient to reach these goals. Your enthusiasm makes me day!

[4] Practically, I realize that you are not able to keep up to date on every medication that is out there on the market, but when you have to ask me how to spell the name of my drug three times, which happens to have an ad in all the best-selling magazines, I question how often you get out of the office.

[5] When you say things like, “You cope so well with your disease. I really admire what a great attitude you have,” that can keep me going for another week.

[6] When you have asked, “Can I pray for you?” I’m very thankful for your offer. I know some of your patients may say no, but for many, it may be the first time someone has ever offered to pray for them.

[7] There are times when I am have been having a medical procedure and my family is not able to be there. I know it’s a minor procedure for you, but the fact that you understand it’s a major procedure to me, and you stick around and hold my hand, is one of the nicest things anyone ever does for me.

[8] When I’m in the hospital it’s hard to give over the disbursement of all of my medications to you. I’m what some call a “professional patient” and used to taking care of myself; monitoring my pain level and knowing when and how much medication to take. When you go the extra mile and help me get medications on time, I really appreciate it. The time of day I take it can make a huge difference in my pain level for the day.

[9] I know that you are human and must have rough days too. It is okay to tell me, “Today has been a crazy day.” You are certainly allowed to be moody, but let me know why in simple terms so I don’t take it personally.

[10] I really do have a life, even if it’s filled with medical visits, therapies, lab test, etc. I’m not trying to be difficult when you are scheduling appointments or trying to reach me. I just want my family to have as normal of life as possible despite my illness.

[11] I appreciate it when you are able to call in prescriptions so they are ready at the pharmacy when I get there. I know it’s an extra step for you, but it helps me tremendously.

[12] When I am in the hospital your willingness to help with a shower, change the sheets, or just have a conversation to distract me from where I am, makes all the difference in my stay. I appreciate the fact that you treat me like a real person, and not just a project.

Being chronically ill is not easy. Neither is the career of a nurse. By each person remembering to say, “thank you” and “I admire your strength,” both the nurse and the patient can have an effective, even enjoyable, relationship.

Lisa Copen is the founder of Invisible Illness Awareness Week held annually in Sept and featuring a free 5-day virtual conference w/ 20 seminars online. Follow Invisible Illness Week on Twitter for prizes and info. Blog about invisible illness on your site, be a featured guest blogger, meet others, read articles and lots more. Make a difference!

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